My First Story Overhaul

Oh Lord, how time has flown. My poor WIP has made it to its second draft today. And while I wanna just get on the dancefloor, I'm actually banned from it in sixty countries, it's so freaking weird. I've never managed to get to the point where I can't recognize the draft. I've aborted some of my characters, others have changed gender, all of them have had their goals tweaked, and I managed to birth a couple of new babies that'll no doubt get killed off later on. And that's just the characters, the world that I have created has also changed to suit my needs. While I once talked about several different cities, it's all boiled down to just one massive one that has several layers to it. I even went so far as to change the season this story starts in forget winter, we're going for spring now, baby!

And while it's all super exciting, it also plants a few seeds of doubt into my tiny brain. 'What if the theme is harder to understand?' 'What if my plot doesn't make sense anymore?' 'What if I just decide to eat cake instead of ice cream?'. While I do have issues with the last one, it's not nearly as important as the other issues presented. Unlike that first draft when you were full of bright smiles, happiness, and pixie-piss, the second draft feels like the dark version of all that. Now I'm full of frowns, sadness, and...What's a negative version of pixie-piss? Demon-piss?

Who knows.

And while all this is going on I know that something very important is happening, something that will no doubt change me into a better person...I'm challenging myself. It's so freaking easy to sit down and make up a magical world, a theme, and a few characters; but it's much harder to sit down and believe that every bit of it is complete and utter crap. That you have to get in there with your scalpel, drill, and old rusty axe, and get rid of what's just not working. It's sitting there and saying 'I'm not always right, sometimes I'm wrong, time to fix my mistakes'.

I-I think I'm gonna cry.

Anyway. this was a pretty sappy post. But I like to think I'm growing in my writing life, as well as my dwindling teenage life.

Now I'm gonna rot my brain by playing Mario Kart 64.