An Idiot's Review of Dolls

So after taking exams, crying in a corner, and getting ready to move out of my lovely parents' house, I'm reviewing this short story written by one Simon Ericson. As usual I don't post spoilers about the story, so you shouldn't either in my tiny and very inactive comment section.

So our story starts...Without a prologue. It jumps straight to the point and introduces us to the main character Officer Morgan. Unlike a lot of stories that just up and throws their characters into the occult world, our officer has been there before and he's even made friends within it. He calls these people the 'Craftsmen' and they make different things like eyeballs and strange potion stuff that, from the way it's described, reminds me of a magical lava lamp. These people are the ones who help him learn of our plot word, and coincidentally enough the title,'Dolls'. Dolls were coming. These dolls are apparently coming and with them coming the criminals are leaving, either under their own power or being butchered like pigs.

However not all is lost, but then again isn't criminals leaving a good thing, because Morgan has found his prime suspect. A dashing young man named Arthur who was about as fake as they came and didn't do a good job of concealing the fact that he was suspicious. After a debate that went in circles he finally leaves and our plot launches into action when Morgan get's a strange phone call and remembers what happened only a few minutes before hand.

Now the plot for this book is pretty standard for an urban fantasy cop escapade. The cop is warned/accidentally finds strange happening, they go about trying to stop the strange happenings, the day may or may not be saved. And while this is true for this story, it's interesting in the fact that the whole time Morgan doesn't deny that anything happened. He doesn't deny that little doll girls tried to kill him, that they are commanded by older men, and that they are not the least bit human.

Which reminds me of the magic system. If you've like Rozen Maiden, Chuckie, or something along those lines, then you'll like this book. The dolls aren't human and instead are spirits that are put into dolls made from various ingredients and are constructed by Dollmakers. According to Arthur it's not an exact science and there's much shadow over the entire operation. However what's explained so far, such as the doll's heart having to be something with a constant tempo, is rather interesting and I hope it gets explained further in the next books.

So those are all the good points, so what's the bad? I didn't like the way that some of the actions were explained. 'As surly a tone as he could manage'. The writing should tell us that he is trying to be all sour. Also there's some things that really didn't need much explanation, it was just snippets of life that gives Morgan more character, but what was put there could have been more doll musings or something. Aside from that it was an all round good book with good characters, an interesting magic system, and the beginning of a pretty good series.

So yeah, I'm gonna go play some Spiderman 2 now....

If you wanna get Dolls, for free might I add, just go here.

Teenagers, the Original Idiots

I know it's almost been a month, I know I'm due for a book review, and I know I have a video that needs to be uploaded. But there's this very strange thing....I have a life. A very boring if not monotonous life, but a life none the less.

And in this life I'm a teenager.

....

...

Is that the title I see? Okay, enough with the stupid jokes. This month's...week's....something's post is about teenagers in fantasy. With YA being a big hit and teens being the subject of all kinds of adult coming of age stories, I guess it's about time to address the original idiots of the world. However you'd never know that if you were unlucky enough to read a terrible fantasy story. Most times these teens know EXACTLY what they need to do in life, all the steps it'd take to do it, and all the finesse and skill that would take normal people who has one foot and half their left arm in the grave they're so old. Now some people could chalk this up to protagonist rights or chosen one privileges, but I like to call it for what it really is.

Terrible writing.

I'm a teen and I think I can speak for all of us when I say we don't have it all together. Heck, just two days ago I was freaking out about buying and filling out a money order for the first time. That sounds easy to most people, and it is, but I'd never done it before and people were actually counting on me to get it done. It was a responsibility and something new to learn, two things that never blend well with teens. So why is it that all the teens in fantasy have no REAL issues with saving the world aside from the usual teenage, or what you adults must think is teenage, angst?

So since I can't find whatever the teen protagonists of books are drinking, I'll just help you adult writers remember what it was like to be an original idiot, and help you teen writers get your head's out of your butts.

When writing teen characters don't forget that we're young and haven't actually experienced life to the fullest. Now that doesn't mean characterizing us as terribly naive, there's no such thing as a mentally pure teenager no matter how often you see it in movies or books, or making us angsty childish pricks. Have a balance of someone who knows when to take up responsibility, but doesn't know all the ropes yet. And please for the love of all that's holy don't have us complain all the time!

Believe it or not teens don't complain to every living or non-living thing about their lives. Do we do it when you adults are around?

 Yeah.

Why?

Attention! If we complain enough we hope you'll tell us to stop washing dishes and you'll do it yourself! At least that's why I do it, that may not be why the brat down the road does it. Even for characters that aren't teens,  far too often it get's boring to read about how Esmerelda the Valiant lost her puppy, Gir, to the evil knight of Hamminess. It not only get's old, but you begin to wonder if Esmerelda had no life outside that idiot dog of her's.

For you urban fantasy writers out there let me tell you a secret. Not every single teen alive either wants to be outside of the social conga line, or think they have to follow whatever the conga line is doing. Most of us are a healthy balance of both. I'm not into social media all that much, just Twitter because I want to follow some really awesome authors and anime studios, and I don't enjoy watching reality TV. However I LOVE finger nail polish and will squeal when I see something super cute in the store or even on someone else. So don't think your character is 'good' because they aren't popular, because a lot of the unpopular kids can be just as jerky as the popular school barbie.

So to sum it all up let me put it to you this way. If it will help you relate more think of them like interns at your super important adult jobs. They know when to help out, but they may over or under do it, or they complain and want to take a break to get a coffee. Sometimes they say the wrong thing, sometimes they have the wrong impressions on things, and sometimes they're just real idiots.

Now I'm gonna go take a nap....